Fascination with toilets

Dear Editor:It is always interesting to read the disparate views of Patriot letter-writers. We all care passionately about the way things are going in our fair city, and country, but we don't always agree on the best way to solve perceived problems. We do have many things in common though. One of those utilitarian tasks all of us perform on a daily basis is the simple flushing of a toilet. Did you ever wonder where the, ahem, "material" goes as it swirls around the bowl and disappears from view? In the case of Downey, it proceeds directly to the thriving metropolis of Carson, Calif. More specifically, it arrives at 24501 S. Figueroa St. which is the home of the Joint Water Pollution Control Plant, or JWPCP. The JWPCP covers 48 acres and is capable of processing 400 million gallons of wastewater per day. I submit it is the sovereign duty of all Downeyites to do their part daily to keep the JWPCP well supplied with the required "raw material" to keep their plant running at an optimal level. Indeed, when I flush a toilet, I sometimes say to myself, "I'd better send that down to Carson right away, the sooner the better." Of course, they're going to be pleased to get it. It's job security for them. In fact, (I may be wrong about this( but I believe they are in the Guinness Book of World Records as having the most secure jobs in the world. An interesting adjunct fact dealing with this subject is that if toilets in Downey are properly following the laws of nature, as the toilet is flushed, the water in the bowl should swirl in a counterclockwise fashion. This is because Downey resides in the northern hemisphere. Due to Coriolis force, toilets in the northern and southern hemispheres swirl in opposite directions. The next time any Downeyites are visiting Australia, I would entreat them to flush a toilet to confirm that the water does indeed swirl in a clockwise fashion. (I'm sure all Downeyites are keenly interested in such esoteric information.) The other day my wife had the audacity to suggest that I might now have enough to do. Given the subject matter of this letter, she might be right. Jack Russell Downey

********** Published: Jan. 9, 2014 - Volume 12 - Issue 39